paranoia kills me, help!

so i have some kind of paranoia. im so paranoid if i have to face a new places, with new people, my mind tries to screw me up. it keeps telling me "hey they're mean, they dont like you" im sooo sick with this mind.
and the fact that im into university now, new place obviously, new people totally makes me scare, yes scare.
for some people i know it's funny but for me, it's creepy. i have to fight with this such feeling. i hate the feeling of unaccepted in new places. well in the reality, they welcome well, they're nice to me, but still my mind keeps thinking bad. maybe i have some trouble with my mind. too much movie maybe haha.
so im trying so hard to escape from this fear, this paranoid thing, i make new friends, just to make sure im not gonna be alone there. im happy knowing this, really happy.
im working on this paranoia, i hope soon i'll be okay if i have to face a new place, and my minds telling me "they love you" i do hope so!

life is like piano

life is like piano it depends on how good you play so you can compose a beautiful melody into song.
it's all depends on your willing whether to make a beautiful melody or just a monoton one.

the one who can make your life up is your own self, never ever wish someone can make it up for you.
happiness is not to be found but it is to be made. so dont waste your life to find where your piece of happiness are because you might not realize  little things can make you happy too.

i'm obviously who i am

Everything tells me that I am about to make a wrong decision, but making mistakes is just part of life. What does the world want of me? Does it want me to take no risks, to go back to where I came from because I didn't have the courage to say "yes" to life? - paulo coelho

i think it's okay if we're being narsistic 

you need to love yourself before you love others

black long sweater - come, unbranded scarf

unbranded bag from local store  

pictures have said it all

my hands are so itchy to post some photos up. im gonna post some photos up. random photos. i believe behind every single photos that has been captured it has their own story and memory. photos are the only thing that you can always see, remember, because someday you may forget about it but photos can remind you.
i post some photos that have been taken lately.

so this is brand new photo. yay. with my mates. it was taken in monumen serangan umum 11 maret or something i dont know the exact name hehe. we're all waiting the photo session so yeah we took photo.

me with mybestfriend echol and eska, we're soo camera geek haha.

"A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart, and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words" - donna roberts

 me and rosa, i like the flower detail on my ear on this photo.

this one was taken on my yearbook photo's session, it was on monorail at tugu station. i love this! and this photo left to right : echol - me- etta - mba cicie - eska
so mbak cicie is the photographer's gf she helped us during the photo session. she is so beautiful. envy her :D

this one such a shame photo seriously hahaha we acted to be nerd. it had been taken when we had our practical exam, france pratical exam. we look so nerd,dont we ?

menjelang hari besarku

rasanya tidak karuan. rasa takut, deg-degan semua bercampur jadi satu menjadi rasa yang bahkan susah dijelaskan dengan kata-kata. perasaan yang bercampur aduk mengiring pengumuman UN. Seandainya saja pemberitaan di media massa tidak semenakutkan itu mungkin saya atau lebih tepatnya kami juga tidak akan setegang ini. Sayangnya pemberitaan di koran, televisi, atau bahkan di beberapa website menyatakan tingkat kelulusan begini-begitu. saya sih inginnya mengabaikan, tapi bagaimana ? tetap saja pemberitaan itu memberikan efek buat saya. saya yang tadinya tenang jadi galau, resah. Ahh. Tapi saya yakin Tuhan sudah merencanakan segala sesuatunya indah untuk kita semua. Kita hanya bisa berpasrah dan tetap berpikir positif. bahwa segala hasil usaha dan kerja keras kita selama berbulan-bulan berbuah manis untuk kita semua dan kita semua bisa LULUS. Amin.

eat, pray, love- elizabeth gilbert

   People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that's what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life.
   
  A true soul mate is probably the most important person you'll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. But to live with a soul mate forever? Nah. Too painful. Soul mates, they come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then leave.
  
 A soul mates purpose is to shake you up, tear apart your ego a little bit, show you your obstacles and addictions, break your heart open so new light can get in, make you so desperate and out of control that you have to transform your life, then introduce you to your spiritual master...

life is . . .

Life is an opportunity, benefit from it.
Life is beauty, admire it.
Life is a dream, realize it.
Life is a challenge, meet it.
Life is a duty, complete it.
Life is a game, play it.
Life is a promise, fulfill it.
Life is sorrow, overcome it.
Life is a song, sing it.
Life is a struggle, accept it.
Life is a tragedy, confront it.
Life is an adventure, dare it.
Life is luck, make it.
Life is too precious, do not destroy it.
Life is life, fight for it.